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认不清，看不清。。。
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
♥ 1:50 AM
Perhaps, it's a good thing that my family's out of town afterall.
I've been becoming more and more 'recluse'-like these few weeks. Sleeping alone at night for the first time was a little weird and scary. On the other hand, I'm appreciative for the alone-time that I have, which really allows me to concentrate on my work, reflect on certain things, and basically do whatever I want.
Ohh well, some things tt I've realised:
- I should learn how to take things easy.
- I'm overwhelmed with workload stress
- People typically place 'family' at the top of the list, followed on by 'friends'. But do our daily actions and relationship with these 2 groups of people really reflect that?
- Love is something that can bring infinite joy and comfort, and give you feelings so intensely painful, you wonder how is it that you are still able to breathe through that constricted heart of yours.
- Memories from the past (before NP) were what I really wished to erase away (used to)
- The day when you are able to look back with a nostalgic smile and without a frown or flicker of hurt in your eyes, is the day when you realise you have truly moved on.
- Opening up to (certain) people again regained some of my faith on friends' trustworthiness that I used to have and lost a long time ago (6 years plus ago)
- I've come a long way in terms of getting myself to trust people again. I've to say, I'm slightly happier now cos being too wary, thinking too much before u actually say something to pple, is really tiring.
- On the other hand, with people whom I don't trust/whom I'm not close to (you know, those who only look for you when they need help... or those whom have previously hurt me), I still listen to them, but without the benefit of a doubt.
- Only those people who make the effort to understand me will be able to sense that I DO have a temper. Those who don't will never get past their intial and typical impression of me.
- Only those who know me very well will understand what I mean when I said I wished to erase those past memories away. These people will not tell me otherwise, or say that I shouldn't be thinking this way. Because they will know what had happened (It took me 1 year before I was ready to actually tell Xinyi).
- There can be, and there are people who try to get close to me, but they will never truly be able to.
- Can I say that perhaps it's cos I am still wary of people?
- I should be getting more sleep.
I'm seriously a person who thinks far too much (though not as much as the past anymore). I confuse even myself at times. Talk about intrapersonal skills. lol. I should let Howard Gardner do a thorough psychological assessment of me. Perhaps he could come up with a ninth intelligence... What am I talking about. Hahaha
ASSIGNMENTS ARE BEING MEAN TO ME!
Btw, I think Piaget and Vygotsky are really hardworking people who sacrifice 1/3 of their lives into researching and writing their theories. Whoever spends so much time defining the wonderful complexities of growth? Blaaaaaahh.
I should have opted for a Business course as my first choice back then. Then I wouldn't be so stressed that I am actually blabbering such nonsense now.
Or, maybe I should become a reading professional who spends half of her waking hours reading between the lines and analysing the hidden meanings behind literature texts? =D
I need a break from school work.
I hope my family has gotten some nice clothes for me at Guilin! Hmm, what if they are too cheena-ish?
Oh no, WHAT am I talking about now?
I need to sleep.
- -Huey-
